78 Years Old Joe Biden Falls Three Times As He Boards Air Force One

American President Joe Biden fell three times attempting to board Air Force One on his way to Atlanta. The president who is 78 years recovered his balance and even managed to give a salute at the top of Air Force One stairs before departing to meet with Asian American community leaders in the wake of the Atlanta massage parlor massacre.

The president’s Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre told White House pool reporters the president was “doing fine” after the fall.

Mr. Biden’s fall on this windy morning at Joint Base Andrews comes after he suffered a hairline fracture in his right foot playing with his dog Major in November, after which he was required to wear a boot for weeks.

The fall today has heightened concern from a section of Americans on whether the president is in a good state of health to lead the country. The concern is aggravated more by the fact that Joe Biden is 78 years old. However, some feel the fall is not a concern since Biden is not the first president to stumble on the stairs to the plane. In 1975, president Gerald Ford fell down the stairs of Air Force One arriving in Austria. His wife Betty Ford, however, maintained her poise. Former President Barrack Obama has also suffered the same predicament on the stairs of Air Force One.

In an unexpected turn of events, Uhuru Kenyatta turned on the succession politics of Kenya, amidst growing concern that he had ditched William Ruto for Raila Odinga ahead of the 2022 general elections.

Speaking at the Sagana State Lodge retreat, the President posed the question, “I have never said i will not suport Ruto. Why do you keep insulting?”

The President continued to say, “Yes i said 10 years. When did my 10 years end?”
The President seemed to be telling off his critics over claims that he had abandoned his deputy, William Ruto and claimed that at no one time had he said that he will not back Ruto once his term is over.
Deputy President William Ruto and his allies have never hidden their distrust for the Building Bridges Initiative (BBI), an outcome of the March 2018 peace pact between the President and Raila Odinga, his long-time political enemy. The initiative was symbolised by the famous public handshake between the two leaders, a moment now simply referred to as “The Handshake”.

Ruto and his allies have since then been sidetracked and fear that Uhuru Kenyatta would renege on the promise that he would back Ruto for president at the 2022 elections after serving two terms.
On his first day of the Sagana retreat, the President said he was not bothered with what was being said, pleading with the local leaders to educate mwananchi on the fruits of the BBI.

The MPs who attended the afternoon session described it as one of the most conducive engagements they have had with the president.

“It was a very friendly affair, with the president using persuasion to drive his point home and with this momentum, I’m sure BBI would sail through in the region,” an MP who attended the meeting said.

Wiper party boss Kalonzo Musyoka was on the receiving end today after UDA politicians blasted him in his backyard of Machakos county.

While on a mission to campaign for the United Democratic Alliance (UDA) candidate businessman Urbanus Ngengele, Onesimus Kipchumba Murkomen, Senator for Elgeyo-Marakwet County asked Wiper Party leader Kalonzo to join Deputy President William Ruto in the 2022 campaigns.

He was speaking in Machakos in the company of former senator of Machakos, and the interim chairman of UDA, Johnstone Muthama in the upcoming Machakos Senatorial by-election scheduled for March 18.

Kipchumba Murkomen sent a message to Kalonzo Musyoka urging him to ditch Jubilee, and claiming that it was a capsized ship that will not help him.

The Elgeyo-Marakwet senator adviced the Wiper party leader not to be like the lazy bees which are left behind in an old hive eating leftovers, while the others leave to look greener pastures.

Saying that UDA only has goodwill for Kalonzo, he urged him to join William Ruto if he wants to one become president of this Kenyan Republic.

The campaign trail is growing hotter everyday in Machakos as the battle for the senate seat draws towards the end come March 18. The duel is between UDA’s Urbanus Ngengele, Wiper’s Agnes Kavindu Muthama and Maendeleo Chap Chap’s John Katuku.

Sixteen aspirants had sought UDA’s nomination for the by-election. UDA named their candidate a day after Kalonzo Musyoka’s Wiper party unveiled Muthama’s ex-wife, Agnes Kavindu as their candidate for the by election.

A furious Kalembe Ndile was breathing fire yesterday at a church function as he blasted Deputy President William Ruto as  a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

The fiery politician could not mince his words as he attacked the deputy president, daring him to sell his possessions and pay back threefold.

He continued to give an example of one Stephen Ngei Musyoki, the owner of Makindu Motors who allegedly supplied computers to the DP’s office and was allegedly not paid.

Saying that he was an angry man at Ruto, Kalembe Ndile revisited the Weston Hotel land saga, allegedly claiming that the hotel was developed on grabbed land.

The former Kibwezi MP and former Assistant Minister also mentioned how Ruto approached and convinced him to let his political party TIP TIP join other parties to form the Jubilee coalition. The Independent Party (TIP TIP) has since been dissolved.

Ndii refused to be labelled leftist or rightist, liberal or non-liberal. This is where he said that Mutahi is not intellectually qualified to label him with his vast knowledge, experience and expertise. He claimed he has always been consistent from day one to today.

Unanuka Pombe…how to get eid of alcoholic bad breath.

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You had so much fun last night. The drinks were flowing generously. The music was fantastic. You bumped and grinded in dance. And you screamed your heart out in merry making.

Fast forward to this morning. You wake up and the first thing you notice is this foul smell around you. At first, you can’ t believe its coming from your mouth! Its awful! That’ s when you remember last night and all the alcohol you consumed. And that’ s the one reason you have such bad breath this morning!

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The first genius idea you can think of is to brush your mouth. Which you thoroughly do. And you rinse your mouth vigorously afterwards. You even thoroughly brush your tongue! And since the smell of toothpaste is all around you now that have freshened up, you feel like you have won this game. ” Oh. . . the wonders of toothpaste” , you celebrate.

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But your celebration is only short lived. Unfortunately for you, and very disappointing too, the bad breath is still there! And you are so afraid that people at your place of work will get a sniff of it. And what a shame that would be. Which isn’ t comforting at all. And the million dollar question is, ” What do i need to do to get rid of this alcohol- induced bad breath?

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How do you get rid of this bad breath? Easy does it. . .

1. While you are enjoying your favourite drink, whether a beer, a whiskey, a gin, a vodka, or whatever your poison, drink plenty of water. This is so self- explanatory i dont have to add anything more, right?

2. At the same time, get some bites. Eat some njugu karanga, popcorns, nyama bites and other muchies.

3. The morning after. . . take food with a lot of onions or some garlic. I know some of you are coiling in disgust at the mention of garlic. . . but i wouldn’ t mention it if i wasn’ t sure. . . right?

4. Take a proper long shower. . . the morning after while using a strong scented soap. . .

5. Before you leave the bathroom, take a good poop. . . YES. . . SERIOUSLY! Its true that the bad breath doesn’ t come from the mouth. It comes from the upper stomach. Did you know this? Huh. . .

6. Use a good mouth freshener. . . after that long teeth brushing. . .

7. And last but not least. . . Don’ t overdo your drinking. . . are we together?

Now you know. . .

Nitukane tu…Uhuru Tells His Detractors.

In a move seemingly aimed at selling the BBI to the Mt. Kenya region, Uhuru Kenyatta this morning held a mega radio interview with the big Kikuyu FM stations.

During the interview done at State House Nairobi, President Uhuru Kenyatta talked at length about the many issues the nation is going through.

Key on his agenda was about the BBI. He talked at length at the merits of the BBI, pleading with his detractors to stop fighting the innitiative before understanding the long term benefits it will bring for generations to come. He requested people to stop looking at the billions to be spent on the BBI, but to rather look at it as an investment that will bear great fruits in the future.

In a statement seemingly directed to the Tanga Tanga movement, the President quipped jokingly that they can continue insulting him but he has no time to waste on the insults. He said that his focus is on his development record and leaving a legacy of peace for Kenya. While not mentioning anyone in particular, he seemingly gave them permission to continue with their insults saying that nothing will distract from his development agenda.

Speaking on the BBI, the President clearly stated that it is not ” Raila’ s project” as some are saying.

The president has of late been under attack from the Tanga Tanga brigade and especially from the impeached former governor of Nairobi, Mike Sonko.

The interview carried out in the Kikuyu language was seemingly aimed at the Mt. Kenya region as well as the Kikuyu speaking people all over the country.

How to buy Safaricom airtime even with an existing Okoa Jahazi.

These are truely hard times. Money ain’t easy to come by. We put every effort to earn some, but we are almost always hitting a wall and falling back to zero.

Truth be told, most of us have numerous money lending apps in our phones to access small loans. We have been posted on CRB because of the numerous mobile loans we have taken and been unable to pay. And even on the near ground, we are always taking the popular airtime loan called Okoa Jahazi.

The problem comes in when you are in dire need of making a call and just this morning you received this sort of message from your mobile service provider.

“You have an overdue Okoa debt of 465.00KSH service fees of 39.00 KSH that must settled before 2021-01-15 00:00:00.Dial *131*0# for more information”

You have absolutely knowhere to turn to. You have no cash on you. And yet there is this very important call you have to make. And the headache you are experiencing is very real because even the 100 shillings balance in your Mpesa account seems to be of no help. And anyway, if you try to buy airtime via Mpesa with the 100 shillings, it will just be swallowed as part payment of your Okoa Jahazi debt.

I have been here before you and so i know the reality of this headache. There is a way you can still use your Mpesa balance to buy Safaricom airtime without having it deducted to repay your Okoa Jahazi. Unless of course they have realised this loophole and blocked it.

This is what you need to do:

1. Dial *444#

2. Select 10: More Offers

3. Select 2: Unlock your gift

4. Select 3: Shs. 100 (250 bob talktime valid 24 hrs)

5. Select 2: Mpesa

6. Enter your Mpesa Service PIN.

You should immediately receive your 250 bob airtime which you can comfortably use to make money for the next 24 hours. And then you can comfortably pay your debts including your Okoa Jahazi.

Try this and thank me later. I am always here for you with these great ideas to give you peace in times of turmoil.

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You can also drop me a comment via pmjoy10@gmail.com

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How to buy data bundles on Safaricom even with an existing okoa jahazi.

It always starts like this. Even before you have woken up to get ready for work, a bip from your beloved phone alerts you politely.

“8.02 KSH has been deducted to repay your Okoa Jahazi. Dial *131*0# to check your outstanding balances.”

Your sleepy mind starts racing because you know the next message that will follow this.

“You will not be able to access Okoa Jahazi for the next 24 hours due to late payment. Please top up to settle your account.”

And then immediately after this message, another one pops up.

“You have an overdue Okoa debt of 465.00KSH service fees of 39.00 KSH that must settled before 2021-01-15 00:00:00.Dial *131*0# for more information”

And now your worst fears just got real. There are so many calls you have to make before you reach your place of work and here you are with no airtime.

And you are thinking the little amount you have in your Mpesa can’t even help you. It will only be swallowed to pay your existing Okoa Jahazi.

And you are so afraid of asking for “airtime favours” because that’s all you do and you never return those favours.

The only comfort you have right now is that you can use text messages. But the minute you send your first text, this message pops up and your fix just gets worse!

“Your current balance is 0”

Your situation is getting practically desperate now. You can now only think of at least three left options. Make reverse calls, send “Please Call Me’s” or use Whatsapp messages.

You decide on the latter. Its at least the most honourable thing to do, right?

The minute you turn your phone’s data on, the last shocker hits you like a bomb on your face.

“Dear customer, Your Data Bundles balance is below 2MB. Click on https://safaricom.com/account/usage to view your data statement.”

You are now completely roasted. Its a completely hopeless situation! And you can’t think of any other possibility. Damn!

I am here to tell you its not hopeless. You are not completely done. The small amount you have in your Mpesa can save you without being deducted to pay your Okoa Jahazi. It can buy you both data and airtime. This is what you need to do.

1. Turn your phone’s data on.

2. Open your Facebook app and switch to Free Mode.

3. Touch on the videos menu in Facebook and click on any huge video.

4. You will see something like this…

5. Click on the BUY and select Mpesa then follow the usual Mpesa procedure to pay and voila!

“You have received 52 MB with no expiry.”

You now have your no expiry data to communicate on other platforms!

The next time you find yourself in this situation, just follow the instructions above and thank me later.

Feel free to drop your comments. You can also talk to me via pmjoy10@gmail.com